There are certain people that uplift me when I’m with them.  They are positive, fun, happy and we have the best times together.  I’m relaxed  which let’s me be myself.  And then there are some people who are negative, not fun at all and leave me stressed out.  How can people be so different in the way they act?

When I’m with people that put out negative energy it’s just not fun. There is complaining that sometimes never ends.  The whole conversation is about them  and how they have been dealt a bad hand.  Instead of making the best of the situation their minds are wrapped around themselves and what they don’t have and can’t do. On the other hand people that give off positive energy look at their cup as half  full not half empty.  They make the best of their situation and try to find a way to make things better.  Basically they are always trying and never give up.

Everyone has moments in their lives when things aren’t going great.  Our friends are there to help us get through. They want to help, but after awhile we  have to help ourselves.  If we don’t like the way things are then change them.  If we can’t change them then get over it.  But stop complaining and get on with life. There are so many people in this world that would love to live in a free country where everyday they  get a chance to make a difference.  Be thankful for what you have.  Change your attitude, make new friends and be happy. Your positive energy will overflow to all those around you.

What do you think? Do you give off positive or negative energy?

One of the most rewarding things a person can do is to give kindness to a stranger. It can be helping an elderly person crossing the street, paying the toll for the person behind you or reassuring the new mom with the crying baby in the check out line.
My favorite thing to do is to be in a restaurant, pick out a table and pay their bill anonymously.

One day there was a woman and her daughter sitting in the booth behind me at Mel’s Diner. I was alone having breakfast. The mom was probably in her 70′s and the daughter in her 40′s. They were talking about Thanksgiving which was a week away and who in the family would bring what. The daughter was stressed and a bit snappy to her elderly mom. I overheard the daughter say that someone else in the family would have to get the turkey because she did not have the money. I felt bad because I knew the daughter was overwhelmed and that was why she was being rude to her mom. I understood also that not being able to provide for a holiday meal could be so stressful. These two needed something nice to happen to them. I pulled my server over and gave her my credit card. I told her to charge my meal and the meal of the people behind me. I also told her to let me leave the restaurant before she told them their bill had been paid. As I drove away I felt so good and hopefully the mom and her daughter liked the kindness and experienced a bit of joy.

Any type of kindness works. Just do it. The joy the recipient receives is amazing and the giver gets a pretty good high too!

Politicians never cease to amaze me.  Their antics while in office is appalling. It isn’t just one but several that think it’s okay to have extra marital affairs.  Of course the common folk are not always angels either but they are not the leaders of our country.  Don’t presidents, senators, governors etc. have any moral obligations to the public that they serve?   When a person becomes a leader in our great country of the United States the playing around has to stop.  It’s destructive, embarrassing and perverted.   And Arnold not you too?  I thought you were better than this.

Arnold Swarzenager the ex governor of California and married to Maria Shriver has joined the club of cheating husbands.  Hidden for 14 years was his affair with the family housekeeper and birth of a child from that affair.  To top this the housekeeper’s  child was born within days of Arnold and Maria’s child.  Arnold beloved by many has let us down.  Why did he cheat when he had such a beautiful wife and family?  Why did he take the risk?    He had to know that he would never, ever get away with it.  The damage to his family comes without boundaries.  What about the mistress?  She must be a callous, thoughtless individual.  What was she thinking working in a home like this and betraying the family she worked for?  What about her child?  It’s not just the complications of Arnold being his father but the never-ending lies. I sincerely hope he gets the help he needs to deal with this.

Is cheating avoidable?  Yes of course.  You have to be committed to your partner.  If your not you should not be together.  Sex is an impulse that can be controlled if some effort is put into it. We practice self control everyday with all kinds of things like being on time for work, not turning a fight into a physical altercation, or even avoiding illegal activities like drugs.  Of course not everyone abides by the rules, but those in public office should.  We put our trust in them and they should act like role models.  Leaders should lead by example.  Arnold has embarrassed himself, his family, and his country, but the worse thing of all is that his family has to live with his indiscretions for the rest of their lives.

The economy in the USA is the worst it’s been since the great depression. A recession in the past would last about 2 years. But this monstrosity has been 4 years going on 5. What does a person do? No jobs, no money, and no life. Well first of all we have to be realistic about exactly what it is we can do. Some things we cannot control. The situation with our country’s economy is in most cases out of our control. Our leaders are supposed to be taking care of that. The result has not been good but most of us are in the same boat. We are in a situation that we cannot do anything about. But we can be responsible about our own personal finances.

We can start by living on less money than we make. That’s a hard lesson to learn but one that has to be mastered. So how do we control our finances during these difficult times? It’s not easy. If you have lost your job it’s even harder. Start from the beginning. List all your expenses and see what you can cut out of your budget. Get down to the bare basics. This is not the time to buy anything that is not totally necessary. Added debt won’t help the situation. Then access your potential to earn a living. Right now you may not be able to replace that high paying job with another. You may get that job back someday but it probably won’t happen today. You have two choices: collect unemployment or get a job that’s avaiable now. If you decide to collect unemployment and sit home and wait for that great job to come along you may be disappointed. What you can do is take a lower paying job and work your way back up. Employers want responsible, honest employees that show potential. If you take that job, work harder than anyone else and care about the company you will stand out to your new employer. The person with a good work ethic who cares about the company will be noticed. What employers don’t want is someone just looking for a job. They want employees that have ideas and want the company to succeed. Sometimes an employee with a good attitude will be promoted over someone who has been employed longer.

Blaming the economy, the president, or your ex boss will not get you back on the path of success. The only person that can do that is YOU. Get out there and market yourself. Be the best you can be. Take that job you never thought was good enough for you. Show your new employer what you are capable of and you will find yourself
on the road to recovery. Times will get better, they always do. With your positive
attitude, good work ethic, and dedication your employment opportunities will soar
right along with the upturn of the economy.

As the holidays approach I am reminded of something that  happened a few years ago. I was just arriving at the local mall with my fifteen year old son.  It was a few weeks before Christmas.  We parked the car and noticed several people standing around and gawking.  Nosey as I am I went to check it out.  There was a little girl kicking and screaming while a man was trying to get her into the car.  I told my son to go to the front of the mall and wait for me.  I boldly walked over and asked the man what’s going on, not sure myself what I was getting myself into.  He said the girl was his daughter, she was having a tantrum and he could not calm her down.  At this point he had totally lost control over her and she was on the ground.  I asked the father if I could help and he said yes, please.  I picked the child up, held her tight and whispered in her ear it was alright.  Her father told me how he and his friend were on the way to the mall. As they drove into the parking lot his four year old daughter decided she didn’t want to go.  She did go into the mall with her father and friend and it was there that she let loose crying and screaming.  Her dad picked her up and took her outside and back to the car. There was one problem it was his friends car and his friend had the keys. The poor man was stuck outside the car with an out of control child and shoppers all around.  As I held the little girl tight and talked to the dad she began to calm down.  She was beautiful with fire red hair and deep blue eyes.  As she began to calm down and  I felt her starting to hold on to me rather than me trying to hold her.  She was still mad refusing to talk to her dad and even her mom when called on the cell phone. After about a half hour she was fine. I put her down and as soon as her feet hit the ground she raised her arms back up for me to hold her some more. My heart melted. That day I felt like a made a difference in someones life. I helped people I didn’t even know by stepping out of my comfort zone and taking a chance. That experience moved me so much and will always be embedded in my memory.  I can’t remember the little girls name but I know I will never forget her.

Don’t get me wrong. I truly love kids. It’s what’s being done to them that drives me crazy. I know Mrs. Feel Good is not supposed to go crazy but I have to vent and I have a feeling many of you may feel the same way.

What has happened to the kids of today. They are spoiled, entitled, complaining brats. Now there are exceptions and plenty of them but they are lost in the masses of the obnoxious ones.

Why do kids have to have everything? And why do we as parents give it to them? Do they need every new electronic device as soon as it is on the market. Designer clothes, please, what’s wrong with Wal Mart, K Mart and Target? And my pet peeve, a new car when they turn sixteen as if they have done something to earn it.Going to school, getting good grades, prepping for college, doing chores and not doing drugs or drinking are not reasons for rewarding our children with expensive gifts they have not earned. What do I mean when I say earned? I mean work, as in a job. If we keep rewarding them for being good kids with extravagant toys what kind of value system will they have? I’ll tell you! They will think everything in life comes easy . They will expect more and more from their parents. It doesn’t matter the income of the parents because the higher the income the more expensive the rewards until even those parents are in debt trying to keep them happy. And they will complain when they don’t get what they want and really badly when their friends do.

Our society is creating spoiled brats. Why is this happening, that’s my question? Parents can say no. They forget they are the parents and not their kids friends. They don’t want them to do without. Without what? A bunch of materialistic crap that does nothing to shape them into independent, secure adults. Stop it parents give them what they really need, the necessities of life. Teach them that their good works are for the benefit of the whole family and they are doing them because they love you. Spend time with them showing them by example what life is really all about and how to make the world a better place. Tell them about the poor, sick and unfortunate and ask them how they think they can help. There is so much we can do for our kids that doesn’t involve ridiculous, out of control spending that measures their self esteem by the clothes on their backs. The child that is raised this way will turn into a valuable member of society with values he can take with him for his own family. And guess what? I have no doubt the BMW will come for him if that’s what he wants, and he will have the pleasure of buying it for himself with the money he has earned at his own job. Wouldn’t that be wonderful?

Opinions welcome. What do you think?

Guilt is one of the biggest downers in our lives and it affects everyone to some degree. You keep beating yourself up over what you do, what you don’t do and what you did. It becomes a vicious circle. You may as well throw a 50 pound weight on your back and then try to get out from under it. Guilt is like a bad dream that keeps reappearing uninvited. It spreads like a disease and takes over your life. Layer after layer it wears you down until it leaves you sick and broken.
Why are you guilty? Did you fail to meet the expectations of someone else, yourself, or your family? To control guilt we have to look at the whole picture. Are you feeling guilty about something you have done or have not done. Did you make a mistake, disappoint someone or make a fool of yourself? Okay then, we all do these things. We are all human. But you know what, we do the right things too and probably more often than our screw-ups. Did you ever help a friend, or go out of your way at work to meet that deadline, or help an elderly person cross the street, or just be there for your family? These things all count and they go in your success column. Even a meal you prepared with love or a book you finally read, these are successes also and most of the time are overlooked. They are overlooked because they are expected and therefore are not counted while your mistakes are usually unexpected and get the bigger reaction. Stop beating yourself up. Your guilt will become such a stress it will eventually make you sick. Make a list of all the great things you do. You will be surprised. They are such common moments they go unnoticed. If you make a mistake think about what you have done and how to prevent it from happening again. Then put it away and don’t waste another minute on it. Take a positive approach and think about what you can do to make someone else happy today.